Irish Family

Fantastic! That is the word that sums up our 2-week visit to Dublin, North Wales and England. It was more than we could have ever imagined.

The hospitality was out of this world. Another word used by Europeans – “spectacular” or “terrific!”

The virtue of hospitality, in itself, is not just about appearances. It seems to have a higher value. Everywhere we went we were asked how we were, and then if we would like tea or coffee, or if we needed anything.
People were so friendly and helpful. The history was incredible. The structure of the buildings was so beautiful. But in their antiquity, we noticed that even the best hotels would not be tolerated in the states. We seem to want everything in perfect order, neat and tidy.

The Europeans put their energy into what really matters: people opposed to perfection.
In Dublin we contacted an uncle of Paul’s whom we had never met. Their welcoming us into their home, with no notice really, was unbelievable.
We were so excited to meet new relatives and first cousins. On very short notice, Aunt Kay put together the most thoughtful meal of scrambled eggs and smoked salmon.
Our dishes were presented so beautifully!

Later that night their kitchen was transformed into an art studio where Uncle Gabriel taught 8 students. He toggled back and forth from the studio to the sitting room, making sure that his guests were all okay. We found out what a talented artist he was (which we got to bring a painting home with us! woo-hoo!), owning his own gallery right on River Liffy next to O’Connell bridge, for 15 years!

Our visit lasted for hours, as we enjoyed the newness of long-lost relatives.

We got a personal tour through the streets of Dublin and were shown where Paul’s Mom grew up. We hiked through Glendalough, a monastery built in the Wicklow Mountains.

During our hike we stopped for tea and cookies and enjoyed the magnificence around us.
We hung out in Kimmage where Paul’s Dad grew up, visiting with three elderly neighbors who knew him well as a young lad.
Benny still rides his bike every day!

We shed a tear when we left our relatives. Not knowing if we’d ever see them again was a sobering thought.

What did we learn about European hospitality?

These people were taught how to be hospitable. It didn’t just happen by chance. It has made me re-evaluate exactly what I am teaching my children. I am excited to be home, now, and to share our experiences with them!

Stay tuned for some of my upcoming “Myth-Busters” of entertaining!


(Photos: (top) cross at Glendalough, downtown Dublin on Grafton Street, Uncle Gabriel and Paul, me and Aunt Kay, Aunt Kay’s yummy meal, tea and cookies, (bottom two) Benny)

This is the receipt that we found in Paul’s Mom’s purse. We tracked down his Dad’s family home by looking up this address, dated back to 1954! It was quite an adventure, to say the least.

On Holiday!


Hey Friends — I’m over in Ireland, Wales and London. I’ll be back soon with some exciting insights into European hospitality!

(photo above taken on Grafton Street, downtown Dublin)

Own Biographers (and sticky-fingered kids!)

Our children are our own biographers!

Paul and I often wonder what will they pen about us when we are gone?

Will they write of our open hearts and love for others? Or will they write about our small-minded ways and self-centeredness?

Are they learning to trust that our reaching out to others is not a waste of effort or time? That throwing ourselves into loving people and God is most important?

I love this quote:

“Life is an exciting business, and most exciting when lived for others. I am a pencil in the hand of God.” -Mother Teresa of Calcutta
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Here’s a recent question that a reader asked me about hosting children:

We just came home from a potluck tonight and we had such a great time. There were many families and about 20 kids. This is what I realized. I’m just not sure I could do it. Her house was destroyed….food everywhere…sticky hands and the mess! Oh my word. So I wanted to ask you if you have any rules for dinner parties in the house when there is that many kids involved?

My main concern of course is for my son, who has multiple food allergies. We don’t allow our own kids to have food anywhere other than in the dining room in order to keep the house as safe for my son as possible. But with that many people the adults would have to eat in the living room, and then of course the kids would be eating off their parents’ plates. This plus the fact I have beige carpet makes me break out in a cold sweat.

How do you think I should address this issue, or should I just stick to smaller parties?

My answer?

First of all, I’d never have 20 kids running thru my house, eating food. I save “lotsa kid” events for the spring, summer or fall when we can go outside. Or, if it’s raining, I’ll transform my garage into an area for the kids.

When guests arrive, I tell the kids and the parents at the same time that the food has to stay in the garage!

One year I used my ping-pong table in the garage as an Easter table. I’ve also set up tables and chairs in there for the kids. I put a small table with drinks, water, and cups. And if I see kids running through the kitchen with sticky fingers, I send them back out to the garage!

My friend does the same thing with her garage. She makes it very kid-friendly. She even has a TV and DVD player out there.

The garage idea works for about 3 year-old kids on up. Any younger than that, stick to a smaller party, or make it a party where everyone hangs out in the garage.

Parties can be stress-free, even with sticky-fingered kids!

Managing children well can help us keep an open, loving heart.
(Coughlin Family Nov. 2006 with family pets: Hobbes, Haggis McStitch, and Filly)