Blending Entertaining Styles When I Married My Husband
This week, being our 22nd anniversary week, I’m going to share a short story. Hopefully it will encourage and inspire somebody who needs a little bit of inspiration when it comes to entertaining, because I’ve been doing it for a long time!
By the way, I am very thankful for all my RE readers over the years; so many have become friends! I appreciate YOU!
Here’s my story: Think of two people coming together, newly married, both raised and taught to entertain in different ways.
Let’s do it this way.
Let’s do it that way.
Which way was right? (Our lovely engagement picture 22+ years ago!)
In steps rigidity, the silent squelcher of joy and friendships. And also hospitality, and for that matter, marriages!
So take stubborn me, wanting to do things my way. And then take my wonderful husband, who also felt like his way was right.
22 years later?
We both learned to compromise, to bend, and to blend our styles. So now we really enjoy entertaining together!
Together we started creating new ideas and ways of invited people into our home, became more patient with each other, and when I felt like I was falling in to the “RIGIDITY MODE,” I came up with a new check system that I would ask myself. It challenged me to change and “bend.”
1. Do I want to be miserable?
2. Do I want my husband or my family to be miserable?
Keeping these two thoughts in the back of my mind helped me learn to make changes more easily and go with the flow.
(Dinner party about 12 years ago in our old house. Which feels like forever-ago!)
It’s true that guests will cancel last minute, our food doesn’t always turn out the way we think it should, kids get sick, and entertaining moments can sometimes seem like a flop.
But, in those moments, we learn to relax and realize that perfect rarely exists. Situations of “failure” may actually turn out to be life changing events that help us grow and change and learn to laugh and enjoy.
Thus, here we are today … inviting a lot of folks over for a home cooked meal!
Do you struggle with the curse of being rigid and wanting things to be perfect when you entertain?
Hello and welcome to my home and table!
I’m Sandy—lover of food, family, cooking, THE BIG BOARD, travel, and bringing people together. Through great recipes and connection around the table, we become better, stronger, and more courageous people. Feasting on Life is real, and every time we do it, we grow a little more. Read more...
Happy Anniversary to you both!! :)
Happy anniversary!
Y’ALL ARE SO CUTE! Love this – it was hard for me too when we got married and entertained. I’m so naturally Type-A and Nate is very go-with-the-flow. We had to really communicate through everything so that I didn’t feel out of control and Nate didn’t feel squashed by my crazy entertaining expectations!
I seem to be loosening up- maybe out of necessity!? :) I hosted our little one’s tea party birthday party this week and left the switch plates off and the blue painters tape up in the hall I haven’t put a second coat of paint on yet. I don’t even know if anyone noticed. :)
Congratulations on 22 years!!!!!
May you and Paul be blessed with many more happy years together. Blending two lives together can sometimes be a lot of work but when it’s with the right person it’s well worth it. Congrats to you both and thanks for the lessons you live so well!
Happy Anniversary! May God richly bless you in the next 22 years and beyond!