Day 21. Cancelations: They Will Happen!
Be prepared. It seems that in anything good that we do, something bad always happens. As in, no good deed goes unpunished. LOL.
Inviting people into our homes is a good thing. We need each other. We’ll die in isolation if we don’t prioritize fellowship.
So mistakes will happen, things will not be perfect, people will cancel at the last minute, kids will be sick … but I have a few tips for you.
What if people cancel?
– Have a few back-up friends in mind to call last minute
– You can be honest with your back-up friends, but don’t make a big deal out of it. USE HUMOR (regarding why they were invited last minute)
– Think about your neighbors for last-minute
– If you can’t find someone, it’s okay! Enjoy a wonderful meal with your spouse, or kids.
Although it’s disappointing, t’s not the end of the world if your guests don’t come. This has happened to us many times over the years.
Life happens. People cancel. It’s reality … and it’s all about attitude and perspective when this happens.
Have you been disappointed with your guests canceling at the last minute? If so, what was your back-up plan?
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Pingback: 31 Days to Stress-Free Entertaining! — Reluctant Entertainer
This is a frustration with me also. I usually plan to eat a half hour minutes later than what I tell my guests. If what we are serving will not wait, and other guests are here, I go ahead and start serving. It’s not fair to everyone to wait for just one person. Usually the people who are really late are always late for everything else.
Those tablescape photos are beautiful. What a wonderful way to welcome guests.
Quite frequently, we have more than one family invited at a time. If someone is unable to make it, of course, we miss them but people have been more than gracious with our schedule and the times we have cancelled on others and have been made to feel bad, we decided we would much rather be understanding than to be upset. We usually have a back up plan…and teenage boys can always be invited to help eat “extra party food”! You can almost have two parties for the price of ONE!
This is a very timely post for me. I recently had a party where several guests cancelled. I originally sent out a save-the-date in June for a party in October, figuring that everyone should be able to make since they had 4 months notice. As it started to get closer, I almost didn’t have the party in October because it turned out busier than I expected. One of my friends on the save-the-date list e-mailed me asking if I was having the party because she had cleared her calendar. So I went ahead and had it, and she didn’t show up! She emailed me an excuse the next day but she is the kind of person who frequently says she’ll be somewhere and then just doesn’t come. The other people who couldn’t make it all contacted me in advance.
Long story short, those who did come had a great time and I learned that while things do happen and it’s disappointing, some friends are better left uninvited.
I don’t really mind cancellations…we can always find someone and if not, we just love our time alone together as we are empty nesters. Of course, if I’ve spent a lot on the menu, which doesn’t happen too often, I might experience some angst, but I can always justify that with it being cheaper and higher quality than going out to dinner.
Many years ago it was my tradition to prepare an elaborate holiday event for my seven best girlfriends: a six course meal with wine pairings, elaborate decorations and fancy attire. My husband would shuttle to everyone’s home (about 45 minutes away), pick up my friends and drive them home late after the party, so they would not have to worry about drinking and driving. It was always the highlight of the year for us and we enjoyed this event for nine straight years in a row. On the tenth year, I decided to host a Sunday afternoon tea vs. dinner. This change was due, in part, to my husband working in another state and being unavailable to serve as taxi driver that year.
The morning of the party, it snowed very hard, and then came the icy rain. I tried not to watch the weather reports, but realized early on that surely someone would be cancelling. I had prepared about 10 separate dishes and the food was beautifully displayed on the dining room table with my sparkling crystal, silver and bouquet of holiday flowers. I was organized, dressed, and ready for my guests. As the start time of the party drew near, I started receiving phone calls, one by one and within 30 minuts, ALL of the guests had cancelled. I was devasted!
After a brief meltdown amd several crying calls to my husband, he finally suggested that I phone my neighbors as backups. Reluctantly, I started calling the ladies that lived in my cul-de-sac and practially begged them to come over. Shortly thereafter, six ladies dropped what they were doing and showed up at my front door. Dressed in jeans, sweaters, mittens and earmuffs, they were quite a contrast to my elegant velvet dress and matching hat, but in the end, everyone had a wonderful time. I was never more grateful for these friends and they truly saved the day!
The dinner party we are planning for Saturday was based around one couple…. who now cannot attend. Though I think the first reaction is disappointment…. it’s great to be content knowing that whoever can join in the fun will be there. Sometimes our plans change, but with gracious hosting, good food, and the right attitude ~ it will be a great time. Best wishes for your weekend entertaining plans! Have a great day…
We have had a few cancellations, but I don’t think they’ve been last minute, and if they were we made it work.
Sandly, I can’t think of a cancellation that was a problem. The issue I have a problem with is people who are late. Sometimes the meal can wait but it doesn’t seem fair to make other guests wait. Can you address this issue in some future post? Consistantly late folks eventually get left off my guest list.
Darla
Last December, we were all ready for our annual big Christmas party. We usually have 40+ guests. I had cut back on the amount of food a little because the forecast was for some snow (we rarely get snow in December). It snowed for most of the day of the party, and at party start time we had at least a foot of snow! 6 intrepid people made it to the party, and even though we had too much food, it was one of the most relaxing and enjoyable parties ever. I could sit down and really connect with the guests. Silver linings!
I honestly can’t think of a time when anyone has backed out. Surely this has happened to me?! Obviously, I wasn’t scarred too badly since I don’t remember! I have had a situation where my food couldn’t make it! We invited Ukrainians over to celebrate Thanksgiving with us, and a political revolution happening in the city (and on my street!) kept the man who was bringing me a turkey from getting into town. Thankfully, someone who had commissary privileges at the embassy (I did not that tour) gifted me with a Butterball which I had to defrost in the bathtub. :)
As a single woman who lives alone, cancelations used to really drive me crazy because I was stuck by myself with a ton of food. Then, I realized that although it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to invite single guys over alone, that they were always happy to come collect dinner. So now, when I have a cancellation, I pack a take away container and call a couple of the single guys from the church and tell them to stop by and pick up their dinner on their way home. It’s proven to be a really easy way to minister to them without much efort!