Heart-felt Thank You Notes: Are they a Lost Art?
I’ve realized that this last few weeks our family has really been blessed. I have to admit, I have not had to do a lot of cooking because we’ve been asked out on several occasions. And the part I love is that for most events, our family of 5 was invited. Our family unit is changing here in a week as our son goes off to college, so I think our friends have had that life change in mind.
As I sat down today to write out my thank you notes, I decided to make a post out of it, because I feel that written notes are often a lost art now. It’s a part of hospitality that gets swallowed up in text messaging, emails, and phone calls. Not that recipients are not grateful, it’s just a loss of personableness.
So with great intentions and heartfelt thanks, I set out to write 6 great thank you notes and wanted to share my tips:
Start with the date and salutation
Send your note within two weeks of receiving the gift/invitation.Say thanks right away
Be specific about why you are writing the note. If you’re thanking someone for a monetary gift, refer to their generosity, and you don’t have to mention the amount.Compliment the kind gesture
Don’t be afraid to be really generous with your words. Everyone loves a compliment, and make it heartfelt.Think about the future
Anticipate another get-together, or if you’re writing about a gift, be sure to tell them how you plan to use it.Finish with sincerity
Reiterate your gratitude, then close your words on an intimate note, signing your name(s).Read it through one more time and pop it in the mailbox!
Okay, now a time for honesty.
Do you write handwritten thank you notes?
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I absolutely adore both sending and receiving a thank-you note. I love that someone took the time to write to tell me they enjoyed some part of our shared time.
Yes! I think thank you notes are a must for a generous gift or a kind gesture. An electronic thank you (text, email, etc…) implies not wanting to be bothered with the act of thanking someone for going out of their way for you. It’s lazy and a bit rude. My pet peeve is going to a wedding or a shower and not receiving a thank you. It’s not that I give because I expect a thank you, but I do feel like the person didn’t value the time/money/effort I made to celebrate them if they can’t even say thanks. This is a great post!
Our whole family writes thank you notes for different reasons but I also write about 100 thank you notes a year beyond that. (Wow, that seems like a lot when you add it up!) Our family is stateside missionaries based out of Texas. We have churches and individuals all over the country that support our family and ministry with prayer and financial support. I send 3-4 handwritten thank you notes to each supporter every year so that I can personally express just how thankful we are. We send a newsletter out to everyone so when the pressure to write the perfect thank you note gets to me, I’m tempted to just say an extra big thank you in the newsletter and be done! But I know in my heart that’s not what I want and I forge ahead trying to put my thankfulness on paper.
Thanks for the post!
YES! Love all the comments too from those who still find joy from writing them too!
one of my dearest friends brought us a loaf of homemade banana bread this morning – what a gift! after she left and we enjoyed the delicious bread, i decided to RIGHT THEN create a thank you card for her (seizing the moment of inspiration). my daughter and i pulled out our crafting stuff and made a simple, personal thank you card … which will go in the mail today!
I always write thank you notes and “just because” notes. I’m really big on that. I think it’s so important. With all the “technical” gadgets we have these days, I think people have forgotten about good ol’ snail mail! I think enjoy getting ‘good news’ in the mail too!
I have some waiting to go out today, in fact! Granted, they’re a little late–a month since the baby shower–but as I’m a new mom, I’m pretty sure my relatives will cut me some slack. I’m getting better about making them more personal; I’ve only had occasion to receive a few myself (rather than them being addressed to my parents), but when a close cousin sends a thank you like “Thank you for the gift of money, we will be going to Disneyland. Love, So-and-So” you start to think that maybe you should be more choosy with your words!
I love letters and notes. I love thank you notes. I love real mail. I love stationary!
It is frustrating to me to send a gift and never know if it was received. That to me is the biggest issue with lack of thank you notes these days. It is common courtesy.
For those of you teaching your children to write thank you notes, well done! Press on. It is so worth it to help foster thankfulness and courtesy.
Not only do I write thank you notes (within 2 weeks like you!), but my kids have been writing thank you notes since they could write. At first, they were fill in the blank thank you notes. Now that they are a bit older, they have to write at least 3 sentences. Love the blog post!
Yes, I write handwritten notes – frequently! People love to receive them and always comment about how rare it is. I’ve given a number of graduation gifts this year and only received two thank you’s. Guess they are going out of style. I’ll keep writing and sending them because I know how much I enjoy receieving them.
We do (most of the time). Sometimes I forget to for straggler gifts – like if a gift comes AFTER a birthday party, after I’ve written the bulk of the notes, maybe I let it slip, but for the most part we do… and I actually feel like we get a lot of hand written thank you notes back!
You make such a good point. It is so easy to get caught up in our fast paced lives, emails and tweets are instant and easy. But I adore receiving a hand written letter from friends and loved ones. Which always reminds me “If I love receiving, then they will as well”. This happens to be an aspect of my relationships that I am trying to improve upon :) Thank you for the reminder of how important hand written notes truly are.
I just treated myself to the prettiest little box of thank you notes. My son’s girlfriend’s mom recently sent me a lovely gift for being involved in her daughters life while she is out of the country due to health issues. I do not have a daughter so you can imagine just being a part of this lovely girls life is thanks enough, but I have made sure there was roses and red velvet cake on graduation day, a special lisa leonard necklace for her birthday etc. When I received her gift, I sat right down with my pretty notes and thoroughly enjoyed writing the thank you, after reading your post, I’m so glad I covered all my bases! I even remembered to add that I can not wait to meet her in person. I would also like to add that my sons have never received a gift without sending a thank you, I think it is terribly important!
I DO write handwritten thank you notes, and I think it is something that should be TAUGHT to our kids.
I just know how much I am blessed when someone takes the time to thank me for something.
I also am a big believer in “double thank you’s”. I always try to mention it a second time be it in an email, or verbal or whatever. “Hey I wore that cute shirt you gave. It made me think of you! I love it!”
Just my thoughts…..
God bless!
While I might not be very good at always sending notes, though I do try to, we’ve worked at instilling that art into our girls. My hubby is very good at thank you notes, so our girls have gotten good at sending them for almost everything.
I love sending thank yous! They are a GOOD THING! And even before my kids could write, I would tuck a drawing or scribble of theirs in with the note for gifts they had received.
I also think it’s important to MAIL the notes. I have been getting them via email and that just makes me a little sad. Put a stamp on them, even if it’s to a neighbor! It’s so lovely to get mail that’s not bills…
Yes I agree, some occasions definitely deserve a handwritten thank you note. I certainly hope it is not a lost social art. This world could use a re-introduction to social graces! Thanks for bringing it to light.
I will admit I’m not the best at handwritten thank you notes, even though I love sending them and receiving them. Thank you for the great post and your pictures always inspire me!
I do! I wish more people did too!
I too, am a big believer in the hand written thank you note. As an Army wife, I was taught early on that you always bring a hostess gift when you’re invited to someone’s for dinner and you always write a thank you note. It’s something I grew up with anyway, but would love for all five of my children to pick it up. I have about half of them trained now :)
I do write thank you notes, not as often as I should but I do write them. You are right in this age of instant communication so many of our children and even us older generation, have lost the art of writing in general.. I know that when my mother died as I was going through her things I was taken back each time I saw something written in her own handwriting. Our handwriting has our personality engrained in it, and it can be a trigger of a memory or thought as we look at and re read things that those we love penned. I do think however we are going to lost this with this current generation…… and that will be very sad.
blessing to you and yours Curtis & Sherrie
I always write ‘personalized’ thank you notes. I try to get them in the mail within a few days of the event/gift/etc… or I may forget to send them. I have a large supply of ‘blank’ note cards and a roll of stamps that I keep together for this purpose so things are convenient and readily available for me. If it were more difficult to ‘get to’ I may put it off and then forget. I love your content suggestions. I think I stick to the same format (basically). I agree that it is beginning to become a lost art. I still love receiving person ‘mail’ so I just assume others like receiving it as well…thanks for the reminder of how important this is.
Yes, I do. And I LOVE receiving hand written letters. If, for some reason I’m out of nice stationary I will type a letter, but I always use a font that looks handwritten just to add a bit of the traditional.
i actually LOVE sending snail mail, so i’m really good with thank you notes. i love getting personal things in the mail so i like to do the same for others as much as possible :)