Your House Isn’t Perfect for 4th of July
I once had a friend who threw out her entire baked pie because the crust was a little too brown.
And her kids saw her doing it …
Perfectionism. It not only destroys you, but permeates the minds behind the little eyes of the ones watching you.
Our friends are coming with their little kids today from out of town, for a fun-filled 4th of July week. As I was getting ready earlier this week (you know, changing the sheets, cleaning the bathrooms, trying to get organized), I warned her (in an email):
My house might not be spic and span, just lots going on and super busy here, but I know you won’t care! :)
Now that’s a true friend. When you come to a place where you give it your all, try your best, add special touches, but you still know it’s not perfect.
But it’s good enough.
How is it that we think we have to apologize if we don’t have everything so perfectly in order and clean and impressive?
I’m happy I’ve come to a place where I know entertaining only has to be good.
That is what our 4th of July will be this year. It will be good.
If you’re entertaining this year, what’s your state of mind? Are you stressing that things might not be perfect?
Hello and welcome to my home and table!
I’m Sandy—lover of food, family, cooking, THE BIG BOARD, travel, and bringing people together. Through great recipes and connection around the table, we become better, stronger, and more courageous people. Feasting on Life is real, and every time we do it, we grow a little more. Read more...
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We had friends over for the 4th, too.
I followed my rule of a cut off time from prepping so I could have some time to unwind before the bell rang.
That meant I had to put them to work shucking corn and at the grill but it worked. Nothing was perfect but it really was good enough.
After dinner I put my cream in the mixer to make whipped cream for my homemade key lime pie. It wouldn’t whip. I couldn’t figure it out because that had never happened before. I told our friends the pie would be naked but still taste good. Just as I was about to serve it I realized I had mistakenly poured my half and half in the mixing bowl instead of my heavy cream! So the pie was dressed after all! No big deal.
Hi Sandy,
Happy 4th of July! …And a great post!
This year we celebrated the 4th at our home with both sides of our clan. :-)
By no means nothing was perfect. But everyone had a great time. We had lots of great food with wonderful conversation and many good laughs. A few of our barbecued items were a bit “cowboyed-up” … Our term for a bit burnt…but we just laughed about. And the dog didn’t mind at all. She ate good too! LOL!
Love,
Mary
That is so true. My girlfriends and I never aplogize for our homes, we considered it to be lived in. We don’t visit each other homes as if we are health inspectors, but just to have a good time. Being a perfectionist can drive anyone crazy. Thanks for sharing!! Have a blessed holiday!! :)
Happy holiday, Sandy! Hope your visit is super great. I’ve had to learn that if we waited for our home to be perfect, we would never entertain! Life just happens and we have to roll with it. We will always have a load of laundry in the dryer and a basket of towels to fold or dirty pots and pans in the sink and some splatters on the stovetop to deal with. That’s how life is and our friends live with thoses things too. Dealing with my husband’s medicial condition makes me feel like somedays we need a revolving door on our house but everyone tells us they feel right at home and filled with love and peace when they visit. I never promise a visit filled with perfection but we try to make you feel like you are always welcome. Seems to be working because we all have a good time!
One of the elders preached at our church this week while the pastor was on vacation. His sermon was about hospitality, that we are all called to show it, not only those blessed with “the gift” and I kept thinking about all I’ve learned from you, Sandy. It doesn’t matter if there’s crumbs on the floors (especially with littles in the house!) or dust bunnies, or a pile here or there. People come to see us and we host to give them respite and encourage their souls, to make everlasting connections. It was spontaneous, we picked up pizza and had some families over after church, my sink was full of breakfast dishes and I had to clear off the dining room table, which had been my sewing table, but we were all refreshed and encouraged afterwards, our souls recharged for the week. Thank you so much! We’re not hosting today but are meeting friends for drinks and dessert prior to fireworks.
Many years ago I was like the lady with the pie. Fortunately I learned that being like that can quickly take the joy out of life. Plus it is super hard work to maintain that level of perfection. I’m so thankful that I no longer suffer from perfectionism. My attitude now is if the crust is too dark cut it off or cover it with whipped cream:-)
My husband is the perfectionist in our family. I try my best to just invite people over anyways despite his fussing over the bathroom not being fully renovated or my clutter taking over a counter top here or there. One of these years I am determined that he is going to learn that our friends love us just they way we are and strangers wont become true friends till they see our dirt anyways!
The problem with being a perfectionist is that it’s a lot of work to be perfect all the time. I say, sit back and relax – everyone has a dustbunny or a pile of mail somewhere in their house. As for the pie – throw some ice cream on it and nobody will know the difference.
Happy 4th of July. Enjoy your visitors! (another thing a perfectionist can’t do)
A whole pie??? Oh boy. We usually don’t entertain on 4th of July. Can’t see the fireworks from our home. So we go out.