Raising Hospitable Kids: It Becomes a Way of Life!
My husband and I can talk about hospitality all we want, but we both know and try, mistakes and all, that it’s all about leading by example when it comes to raising hospitable kids.
Our three kids are teenagers now, so hopefully we’ve taught them well. I look forward to when they are adults and seeing the fruits of our labor!
When we have people into our home, we try to show our kids what to do:
1. Smile when sometimes you don’t feel like it. Be positive–don’t impose your bad mood or attitude on others.
2. Ask people questions about their day and their life.
3. Ask them questions about their dreams and childhood.
4. Fill the guest’s glass when low.
Hospitality doesn’t wait. It anticipates our guests’ needs in order to put others at ease and at rest.
And when you do it over and over again, it becomes a “way of life.”
When’s the last time you had guests into your home? Did you think about the lesson of hospitality that you could be teaching your kids?
Hello and welcome to my home and table!
I’m Sandy—lover of food, family, cooking, THE BIG BOARD, travel, and bringing people together. Through great recipes and connection around the table, we become better, stronger, and more courageous people. Feasting on Life is real, and every time we do it, we grow a little more. Read more...
Thank you for this reminder. I found it useful for not only guests but for our family. I think in the current day of running here and there we can forget to be hospitable to the people we see each day. Small gestures of hospitality can be expressed at the breakfast table on Monday morning as well as with our friends that come over on the weekend.
Question for myself: “Were you hospitable today?” “Give one example”
Thanks for the reminder.
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THANK YOU!!! This is so important to me.
Sandy, what beautiful thoughts! I agree that instilling hospitality in kids early on will mould them into thoughtful and caring beings.
Here in India, the age old philosophy is – “atithi devo bhava” (sanskrit) which in English means – ” “The Guest is God”. When I was a kid, my parents would show by example how to treat the guests with warmth, smile and care. My mom would let me ask if the Aunt would like tea or coffee and even let me prepare. And now that in metro cities the ritual of having guests over is not very common, it’s important to introduce our kids to this somewhat lost art of being a warm and caring host and being hospitable…
Thank you dear for this beautiful reminder… :)
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We just celebrated my sons unbirthday … February 29….on the 28th this year! We invited the family friends that he wanted to come, but then about 12 of his friends filed through the buffet line, they had been in the family room, while I was in the kitchen, and I didn’t even know they were there! I LOVE that he invites his friends to show up when he knows there is food to be had! And I was so glad I through in that 2nd pan of home made mac and cheese, because it’s everybodies fav!!! Every scrap of food was gone, including all the snickerdoodles he wanted instead of a birthday cake… glad I hid a plate of those for him in his Dads office …. for the next day!
What a great post. We definitely teach our children hospitality and I think they’re getting it.
What a great post Sandy! My husband and I have found that our kids love helping us entertain. I think it’s such a critical mistake too many make to think they cannot entertain bc they have children. When it’s such a great teaching opportunity. Having help to set the table, plan the meal, greet guests. And yes, teaching them they in addition to answering questions…. how to ask questions and get to know guests. Great reminder in this post today. I hope this finds you doing great Sandy!!!! Have a wonderful day.
Our last time for guests was one of the kids’ birthday parties in January. I think our crazy entertaining schedule from November until then wiped us out a bit and there have been a few business trips thrown in…we need to schedule something, though! We try to go over what “being a good friend” is about with our children prior to the arrival of guests. As they get older, they’ll be able to take on more responsibility, too.
Our lessons are given to our GD at this point. She’s a teen and she frequently phones us, usually when she wants us to go to her basketball game or wants me to take her shopping. She’s always excited and starts out “Do you think we could…” then there is a pause as she catches her breath and starts over… “Hi Nana, how are you? How was your day”. She’s being taught to ask about others before talking about herself which is a good lesson in hospitality I think.
Darla
that is so good. From the time my girls could answer a phone or make a phone call I taught them how to be polite and how instead of calling a friend and just saying “is so and so there”, to say to the person who answers..”hi….so and so, this is…….how are you?” then they can ask if their friend is there and may they speak with them. To always thank their friends parents for having them over, etc..We’ve had several people (even strangers or salespeople) comment on how polite they are. Both my girls love having friends over and planning the time they’re here. I hope that I am teaching them how to be hospitable young women. I think I am.
Sounds like your GD is doing a great job.
We haven’t really entertained since Christmas so I think we’re due! Now that the weather is finally warming up, entertaining will become more frequent and I’m really looking forward to it!
I don’t think I thought much about the lessons of hospitality we may have taught our kids when they were growing up although we entertained quite often. I hope our examples were positive.