Entertaining: it’s not about you, it’s all about THEM. I love this post shared by a friend, about true hospitality. I hope you are inspired to think about hospitality in a new light. Don’t get caught up in the weeds of entertaining versus hospitality, JUST INVITE AND DO IT. The world needs more hospitable people!

Entertaining: It's not about You, it's all about Them

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My friend Kendra is sharing some wise words today. Entertaining: it’s not about you, it’s all about THEM.

Enjoy this thought-provoking message. I took it to heart years ago and it’s helped me with my mission today when hosting guests in my home. Now eight years later, these words often go through my mind when I get of course.


I’m about to get all nerdy on you. Did you know that the word entertain is a transitive verb? Some of you are now twitching at memories of sentence diagramming and rules for proper comma usage and ohmygoodness all those red marks on your papers. Don’t hate me for the reminder; I promise my intentions are honorable.

A transitive verb is a verb that requires an object to complete its meaning. It has to do something to something else. I kicked the ball. Without the ball, kicking makes no sense. I ate the donut. Without the donut, eating makes no sense. (I totally agree with that sentiment by the way.) I entertained my friends. See where I’m going with this?

Peony - Entertaining: It's not about You, it's all about Them

Without people, entertaining doesn’t exist

So often when we prepare to have people over, we get tunnel vision. We focus on presenting Martha food, having floors you could eat off of, a table setting worthy of a Food & Wine photo shoot, and all of this while wearing cute shoes and having skin and hair like Jennifer Garner’s. It’s too much.

It also takes the people out of entertaining

When you have people over, it’s about them. It’s not about you. It’s about making them feel comfortable, creating experiences where they can enjoy who they’re with and what they’re doing, and keeping all pretense from showing up at your dinner table. When you’re comfortable, so are your guests. When you’re flawed, they feel free to be themselves. Sure, it’s great to have food that tastes good and looks pretty in a setting that makes everyone enjoy the process, but without people, all of those things are unimportant.

Did I say anything in there about impressing these people? Because that’s not what entertaining is either. If you’re trying to impress, it’s still about you.

Entertaining: it’s not about you, it’s all about THEM

Entertaining message: It's not about You, it's all about Them

If I find myself apologizing to my guests about the sauce being cold or the mac and cheese being bland or the table setting being a bit boring, I know my priorities are wrong. Why would I want to put my guests in the position to make me feel better? Isn’t that what I should be doing with them? That’s the whole point of entertaining – to make people feel comfortable and enjoy themselves. And when you take yourself too seriously, that point is lost.

Entertaining is not about you. It’s never about you. It’s always about them. I promise you’ll have more fun that way. And who said you’d never use anything from English class…

How’s your attitude when it’s time to entertain?

Some yummy entertaining recipes: Turkey Meatball Margherita-Style Fondue RecipeBEST Chocolate Mint Walnut BrowniesPedro’s Special Mexican Casserole, Veggie Crescent Bites [Mom on Time Out], and Glazed Kielbasa Bites [Real Housemoms].